Tuesday, March 8, 2011
that keeps me so off balance
Here are some photos I took about a week before I left home in September. I never posted this set because I wasn't a fan--and it was a jeans-and-tshirt look. I make it no secret that I hate jeans, but sometimes they're necessary. So yeah, I own a pair or two, but it's been about three months since I've worn them! They're just uncomfortable, and to be completely honest, I don't like the way they look on me. I'd rather have a dress, thanks!
On your own website, it's so easy to completely control the image you put out. You can bet your bottom dollar that I pick through my photos and take out a minimum of two thirds of them, a generous portion because of how I don't like how I appear. Sure, I want to present my best self to the public; what's wrong with that? But maybe there is something wrong if I consistently avoid something (such as pants)--maybe I am, to an extent, being dishonest with my readers. I don't love my shape the way I ought, and I avoid showing off my legs because I can't stand what I look like. I have a screwed-up self image, just like most girls I know. It's not overpowering, but I can't help but let it affect me. Of course I love myself, but at the same time, I often wish myself different.
Does this make any sense? I've tried to put this into a post before but I'm not sure it comes out very coherent. Make of it what you will. I'm not looking for compliments or reassurances; I just wanted to put this in writing to sort out my thoughts a little more--and maybe you can relate and understand a bit! I hope to someday be completely happy with the way I am, but in the meantime, I'm a work in progress. Aren't we all?
top / handmade | jeans / jcpenney | boots / lulu's